Life With Physical Disabilities and Its Struggles

The first thing that comes into the mind of others when they see someone with physical disabilities is a wonderment at how difficult life must be for the individual due to the apparent struggles faced.

People become so fixated upon the challenges of those with physical disabilities that they cannot look beyond what they see. They may later be moved to ask a question, thinking that it was never before asked or that they are the first to come up with it: what is it like struggling with disabilities? They might ask this with a sense of triumph.  

I cannot help but be somewhat taken back when something like this happens, not because of the question itself, but because of the confusion over determining what sort of struggles I should delve into—there are different varieties, different natures, and different levels of challenges. Which ones should I to choose from? Which ones were they expecting me to answer with?

To avoid a tense silence, and the rise of awkwardness, I cough out a question to clarify the terms of the sort of struggles that they are asking about: Oh, do you mean my physical struggles? 

By the time I finish asking the question I am again taken back by a wide-eyed facial response, and their answering inquiry: Do you mean that you’re not just physically disabled? There are other kinds of struggles?”  

Now, now, do not just automatically assume that there must be something else “wrong” with me due to my inability to answer a question with utmost speed.  Yes, I do have physical struggles, where my muscular myopathic weaknesses have caused climbing stairs to be like climbing Mount Everest; where the sight of me sitting in the wheelchair and later walking away confuses the heck out of people holding cups of coffee, so much so that they bump into poles spilling the fresh smelling coffee due to their perplexed and bewildered staring.

Therefore, yes, I do have physical struggles, but then, when I come to think of it, I find myself struggling more mentally. For example, keeping myself from complaining whenever I’m not able to get up from my chair, or not showing frustration towards those who might be helping me when I do not necessarily want help. There is a constant internal struggle to not be, or feel negative towards my physical challenges and to maintain a positive attitude so that I feel grateful for what I can do, and let go of the things that I can not.

My deepest struggle of all is trying to be the best Muslim that I can be in spite of my challenges. I try to focus on the abilities that Allah (SWT) has given me, and not dwell upon the disabilities that I have been tested with; to not only realize, but to internalize the fact that the situation that Allah (SWT) has allowed me to be in is not as important as how I should handle it. Having a positive attitude gives me power over my circumstance as well as over my destiny instead of letting my circumstances have power over me. The struggle to abide in a positive state of mind becomes a waste of time because instead of complaining or being angry I should not only feel determined, but also display my determination and live it. I should trust Allah (SWT) even if my physical situation may cause circumstances to be difficult because where one thing might be impossible, another might just as well be possible with tenacity, reliance upon , and trust in Allah (SWT) for His Help. The ultimate struggle for me is to realize, internalize and adapt to the idea that the true disability in life is not the physical or mental disability, but rather the ones of negativity.

The only disability in life is a bad attitude.

Therefore yes, I did and do have physical struggles, but holistically speaking, it is nothing compared to the internal challenges that I face. The worst part of struggling with disability is trying to remain positive towards others who tend to see the disability before they actually get to see me.  

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